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 Dec 14, 2003 14:38 PST 


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A woman suspects her husband is cheating on her. One
day she calls home and a strange woman answers.

Wife: Who is this?
Maid: This is the maid.

Wife: We don't have a maid.
Maid: I was hired this morning by the man of the

Wife: Well, this is his wife. Is he there?
Maid: He's upstairs in the bedroom with someone who I
figured was his wife

The wife is fuming. She says to the maid..."Listen,
would you like to make $50,000?

Maid: What will I have to do?

Wife: I want you to take my gun from the desk and
shoot his ass and the bitch he's with.

The maid puts the phone down. The wife hears footsteps
and the gunshots, then more footsteps.

Maid: What do I do with the bodies?
Wife: Throw them in the swimming pool.

Maid: But there's no pool here. (a long pause)
Wife: Is this 832-4821?


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                    SHRIMP - RICE - CAULIFLOWER SALAD


   2                    bags, boil in a bag -- rice cooked
   1      head          cauliflower -- coarsely chopped
   2      green         peppers -- chopped
   8      stalks        celery -- chopped
   2      pounds        shrimp -- cooked & shelled
   1      package       imitation crab meat -- drained
   1      teaspoon      salt

Toss together in large bowl. Bind with salad dressing. I use a combination
of Marzetti's slaw dressing and Miracle Whip.


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remember years past or to make 'em say "WOW..where'd you get that?!?"


Tired of the same 'ol gifts? Find something new at The Lighter Side Co.!


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