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Precious-LL&L Monthly July 06
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Benjamin Devey
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Jun 15, 2006 16:37 PDT
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Learning Love and Life
Monthly Relationships Newsletter
No. 149 - June 2006
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Learning Love and Life is a free e-mail newsletter sent monthly to
subscribers. If a friend forwarded this file to you and you'd like to
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The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work
A Practical Guide
from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert
by John M. Gottman
http://snipurl.com/GottWed
In five minutes, Gottman, can predict--with 91 percent accuracy--which
couples will eventually divorce. He shares the four not-so-obvious signs
of a troubled relationship that he looks for, using sometimes amusing
passages from his sessions with married couples. Gottman debunks many
myths about divorce and reveals surprising facts about couples who stay
together. He shares experiences, quizzes, checklists, and exercises,
designed to spot weak spots and strengthen marriages.
The 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work
by John M. Gottman
http://snipurl.com/GottWed
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Precious
(c) 2006 by Benjamin Devey
My wife Robin gave birth to a baby boy this month. As we interact with
him, I’m in constant awe of the capabilities built into newborns. He
places voices, imprints faces and smells. He looks around in wonder,
taking in the world around him. No, he doesn’t do calculus yet, but
neither do I.
Yet, with everything he has going for him a human baby has the longest
growth cycle. He is completely dependent for the first several months of
life. He doesn’t even leave the home to be self-sufficient until
adulthood, two decades into his life (and some don’t make that leap to
self-sufficiency until much later). His physical, psychological, and
emotional development come over long years of experience. Yet, among
creatures, he rises to rational intelligence. In the animal kingdom, we
humans make a peculiar spectacle, acting like we own the place, even
when we have little clue how to run things.
I hold our baby with a sense of wonder and the highest reverence for his
potential. He pre-placed in a world of spirits to come make sense of a
world in conflict, a society torn apart at the seams, hardly discerning
values from vice, light from darkness, or good from harm. Seeing the
society I’m a part of, I see lots of challenges ahead for our little
ones.
Maybe it’s their vulnerability, that makes a baby such a life-altering
event in a parent’s life. They love to be loved, live for all the
nurture we can give them. We can’t give them too much tender care,
watching for our little ones. The word precious comes easily to mind.
What would happen if we treated all of our associations as precious
connections?
How would you respond if the person who meant everything in your life
only wanted the best for you? If your loved ones had no selfish motives
and paid attention to your heart-felt needs and deepest desires, would
you enjoy being around them? Of course. If we treated others the same
way, we’d probably find the precious brand of thoughtfulness
reciprocated.
Precious connections can’t be taken for granted. They’re nurtured with
constant thoughts of gratitude. Service is the key to keeping the fires
of love alive in a relationship. Couples who stay in love do so because
they treasure each other. They have learned they can’t give too much
tender care in their love for each other.
I hope you share precious connections.
Bless Those You Love,
Benjamin
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READERS' FORUM:
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Copyright (c) 2006 by Benjamin Devey. All rights reserved. Permission is
granted for use on web sites, in news groups or mailing lists as long as
this file is left intact.
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