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Smile - it's newsletter time! 010  John Finley
 Dec 16, 2001 12:42 PST 
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John Finley's Learn English newsletter      
Monday 17 December 2001     2001    Issue No. 010
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Contents:

1.   Welcome
2.   Test
3.   Idiom
4.   Useful Links
5.   Jokes
6.   Test answers
7.   Subscribe/Unsubscribe information
8.   That's all folks




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1. Welcome
************************************************


Yippee! It's Monday!

The start of a wonderful week.

Why am I so happy?

Well, at the weekend I went to three birthday parties
and I put up and decorated our Christmas tree.

Plus, this week isn't as busy as the past few weeks
have been so I'll have more time to relax and prepare
for Christmas.

And, on top of all that, the jokes this week are
really good (I hope)!

See what you think ...




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2. Test
************************************************


Complete the following sentences by adding
for or since.

1. Linus has known me ..... 2 years.

2. This product has been available ..... 1993.

3. We've been waiting for the report ..... Tuesday.

4. The baby has been crying ..... ages.

5. I've had my car ..... November.

6. Ingrid has been on holiday ..... two weeks.

7. She's worked with me ..... Monday.

8. That dog has been barking ..... early this morning!

9. It's been raining ..... days!

10. Wolfgang has given up smoking. He hasn't
smoked now ..... three weeks.




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3. Idiom
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#-# to pass the buck #-#

The 'buck' is the responsibility for something.
If you pass the buck then you try to pass the
responsibility for something to someone else.

This idiom originates from poker. The 'buck' is
the marker which shows who the dealer is.
When the dealer passes the buck they also
pass on the responsibility of being the dealer.


Imagine someone makes a big mistake at work.
Instead of ordering two new computers they
order twenty-two.

If they then try to say that it wasn't their fault -
that someone else made the mistake, then they
are passing the buck.


There's a famous saying, "the buck stops here",
which President Truman used to say that final
responsibility for his administration rested with
him and him alone. Now this phrase is widely
used too.




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4. Useful Links
************************************************


Here are some links which may be of use to you.

BBC website
Probably the best news resource on the internet,
with audio and video reports too!
<A HREF="http://news.bbc.co.uk">
http://news.bbc.co.uk
</A>

My English learner website
If you like the jokes in the newsletter then why not
read some more online. There are 20 or so jokes
on my website. You can visit it at:
<A HREF="http://www.angelfire.com/on/topfen">
http://www.angelfire.com/on/topfen
</A>




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5. Jokes
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An English teacher wrote the following words on
the whiteboard:

    woman without her man is nothing

He then asked his students to punctuate it
(to add the correct punctuation).


Maybe you can try this too, before reading on.
Write down the words above on a piece of paper
and punctuate them to create a correct sentence.

Go on, do it now!

-

-

-

-

Once you've punctuated the sentence, read on...

-

-

-

-

The males in the class wrote

    Woman, without her man, is nothing.

-

-

-

-

The females wrote

    Woman! Without her, man is nothing.



It's interesting the difference a little punctuation
can make, isn't it ;-)


#-#-# http://www.angelfire.com/on/topfen #-#-#


Officer: Soldier, do you have change for a dollar?

Soldier: Sure, buddy.

Officer: That's no way to speak to an officer! Now
let's try it again. Soldier, do you have change for a
dollar?

Soldier: No, SIR!


#-#-# http://www.angelfire.com/on/topfen #-#-#


HOW DOES COMPANY POLICY BEGIN?

Take five apes and place them together in a large
cage. In the centre of the cage place a set of steps,
above which you should hang a banana.   

Within a few minutes one of the apes will attempt
to climb the steps to eat the banana. When this
happens, immediately hose all of the apes with
cold water.

After this has happened a few times, the wet apes
will no longer want the banana.

Now remove one of the apes and replace it with a
new ape. The newcomer will attempt to climb the
steps. When it does it will be attacked by the other
apes because they don't want to get wet again.

It will try a few times, but the other apes will not
allow it to climb the steps and get the banana.

Now remove another of the apes and replace it
with a new ape. This second newcomer will attempt
to get the banana, only to be attacked by the others,
including the one who so recently received the same
treatment.

The first newcomer doesn't know why it is stopping
the new ape, but it still does what the others do.

Continue replacing the original apes until all five
apes in the cage are 'new'.

No ape will ever approach the banana. If you asked
them why they would say, "because that's the way
it's always been done around here".

That is how company policy begins!




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6. Test answers
************************************************


Here are the completed sentences.

1. Linus has known me for one year.

2. This product has been available since 1993.

3. We've been waiting for the report since Tuesday.

4. The baby has been crying for ages.

5. I've had my car since November.

6. Ingrid has been on holiday for two weeks.

7. She's worked with me since Monday.

8. That dog has been barking since early this morning!

9. It's been raining for days!

10. Wolfgang has given up smoking. He hasn't
smoked now for three weeks. Well done Wolfgang!




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7. Subscribe/Unsubscribe details
************************************************


To subscribe, send a blank email to:
<a href ="mailto: learnenglis-@topica.com">
learnenglis-@topica.com
</a>

To unsubscribe, send a blank email to:
<a href ="mailto: learnenglish-@topica.com">
learnenglish-@topica.com
</a>




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8. That's all folks!
************************************************


That's all for this week.

Keep smiling!

john finley ;-)

<a href="mailto:topfe-@yahoo.com">
topfe-@yahoo.com
</a>


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